Bitter reality
by shadowgirl94
Summary: How do you feel if you lost everything, would you press on or crumble? Sakura had to choose for some better, for her worse...living in this cruel world is never easy, but for them it's impossible...never let lonliness win...


No right words

* * *

I don't know how long have I been standing here, but it seemed like time has stopped. All I could see was him.

I cannot say how much I have missed him. Every day it felt like a part of me, my soul, was lost. I felt like everything I do is simply nothing to praise. I felt too broken. Naruto felt the same. All the pain and suffering we went through, just for this one minute. Just for this one chance.

Our orders were very clear. Bring back Sasuke Uchiha, dead or alive. As much as I wanted him back alive, we all know that's not going to happen. He is much to consumed in his world of hate and vengeance, to give it all up. Sasuke was lost soul traveling through time, ghost of a once great ninja and prodigy of a lost clan. His eyes are cold, somewhat ice like, lost of all spark and with that so is my hope gone. The man I love is nowhere in that shell. All I could do was watch the man I can't recognize anymore.

But I can't say I'm better than him. His eyes are all too familiar to me. I have seen that often, in my reflection. If anyone knew what was like to fell dead, it was him and me. People told me that I'm different, and I can't argue. Naruto was the first one to notice. The change I mean. I became my work; I never hanged out with my friends. It seemed pointless to me. It still does. That's why I have accepted this mission. It was my remedy, my peace.

I know Naruto is still holding on to his promise. He will try to get Sasuke back; it was his way of escaping reality after all. If he never gave up, he will never lose. I admire that. He has determination, hope, and a life to live. I can't let him get killed. I live life through his eyes, his beautiful eyes.

He was not like Sasuke and me, he had light to go to, but he had to let go of a past that pulled him to his destruction. He had to let go of us. Two friends, to lovers, two dead souls. Naruto has to realize he can't always be hero, there are some things that's just cannot be saved. But I also loved that about him. Someday he will make a great Hokage.

So here we are, in the place it all began. On the Great Naruto bridge. But this time I will not stand on the sideline. This was my time to shine, my goodbye. As I said better me, than Naruto. Not many people would miss me anyway.

I can't help but feel nostalgic, I can't help but go to those old days (it has been so long, jet I can remember every little thing) when everything was much better, where we were a care free kids. We still are young on the outside, but we have seen too much, we have killed too much. It feels like we lived a whole life, not just mislay 18 years.

If I said I wanted to die, it would be a lie. But I can't also say I wanted to live, because that would be a lie too. Death doesn't scare me, but I wish I could live a day where I would finally find happiness. I'm a ninja, and one of the best none the less, but I'm one of those who can't see their future. I can't hope, because I know my dream of future can never be.

My dream is a life that does not belong in the fairytales, mine was a real one, as real as it could get. It had one problem, one missing peace and that was HIM. A man I loved for so long that I can't imagine anybody in his place. I guess you could say I'm ether crazy and obsessed, or a woman in love.

Before Naruto had time to yell out his treats and words of hope, he did not see Sasuke move in for the kill. Luckily I did, and just as his Kanata was about to pierces his heart, I cut him short with a Kanata of my own. Naruto looked scared, and Sasuke looked surprised. I was game on, time to get serious here.

I pushed Naruto out of the harms, and readied myself for the battle I dreamt so much about. You could see Sasuke on the other side few meters away, looking relaxed. It would fool some people but not me. I know for a fact that that pose of his is the most deadly, one wrong move and you are a goner. Simple as that.

In the next moment we were at each other's throats, more than willing to kill without mercy. The simplest way to describe what we were doing, no mercy, no guilt. In one swift movement he slashed his sword though the air almost piercing my neck. I was lucky I was fast enough to dodge his moves, yet I could not bring myself to strike. I guess he noticed it too, cause he became smug, oh so very smug.

"What scared to hurt your precious Sasuke, eh? Too bad, I can't say the same thing…"His voice was so sarcastic and unmeaning that she became furious. How dare he mock her, he was a soulless person.

"Yeah I don't want to kill you, but you leave me no choice" And with she got serious. In a flash she was on to him, pummeling him with everything she had.

Now that made him stumble a little, not that he would ever admit it. But Sakura saw it, and used it to her advantage. Next, before Sasuke could even prepare to block. She had him on his back, with her straddling him, a katana at his neck. A victory smile was on her face. Ha, she showed him who the weak one is!

Sasuke on the other hand, was very annoyed, no; no he was more than that he was ready to go on the murder spree. How could he the mighty Sasuke Uchiha be beaten by his fan girl? And a weak one at that… well he guessed she has changed. He could see she has developed curves in all the right places, but to have such strength now that is a miracles thing to see. But what really surprised him were her eyes. They don't have that shine in them; her emerald eyes became dark forest green. But most of all it made him wander what she has been through to have such dead look. She looked just like him…

"What not going to give me the little speech you and Naruto always say?" the words made her thing what did she ever seen in him. He was such a jerk.

"No you don't deserve a speech, but I can grant you a swift death" If it were anyone but him, she would have killed her pray here and now, but her goal is coming complete and it made her sad of the outcome.

"Che, like you can kill me" Still confident as ever….some things never change.

But now Naruto had to butt in. trying to be the hero and save his friend. What he did not know was that Sakura was given a different mission. She had to kill the Uchiha, and there was no choice in the matter, it had to be done. Sakura accepted the mission under one condition, and that was that Naruto was not informed about it, because she would do the dirty work. She knew Naruto could not handle it, so she took it, so he doesn't feel guilty. He is still normal, warm, breathing, unlike her, a monster with a face of an angel.

"Sakura you beat him, no need to kill the bastard, granny said to bring him home" Oh how she hated herself right now. Naruto was to naïve for his own good…

"Hn" A glare was given from Sasuke, but Sakura thought of a way to give Naruto at least some time with his brother by bond. He and Sasuke deserved that. So she did the only thing she knew.

"I'm not going to kill him Naruto don't worry I was just angry…" Her voice was a little strange but Naruto was so happy that he dismissed it.

"Yo bastard your coming with us haha I told you we were going to get your sorry ass back" Sasuke was not dumb, so he got what Sakura was doing, and somehow he was ok with that. Just like Sakura he saw Naruto as a light in the darkness.

* * *

So Uchiha was tied with chakra strings, and dragged on the road to Konoha, much to his displeasure.

When it reached midnight or so, the ex team made a camp, but they had one tent, so Sakura let Naruto have it, it made everything easier. She could at least have a little peace before she would have to face her brother.

While Sasuke sat by the fire looking in the pit of nothingness, Sakura on the other side of the log looking quite cold but her eyes were uneasy. She and Uchiha knew what will happen next.

In the next half an hour from the tent could be heard a loud snore, indicating that the loud blonde was fast asleep. But Sakura did not move, but grew tenser. By her face you could see that she did not want to do this. Hell she thought, no knew the minute he is dead, she will be dead too. She loved him too much. Sasuke read her like a book, always have and will. I mean with their history it would be offending if he could not.

What people didn't know was that they were lovers for years. When on a mission they went out of their ways to see each other, to feel one the other. Sasuke knew her like no other, her body and soul. He also knew how hard this is for her; he could see she was desperately trying to be brave. It was hard for him too. He knew she had known that when they were fighting before, that he was never going to hurt her. In his own way he loved her. But she was the only one who knew his secret. He was actually surprised that their secret is still undiscovered. But it only served to prove how much they care for each other. Always and forever…

Sakura was on the other hand having a battle in her mind. She knew what she had to do, but it was so hard, almost impossible. The feeling of being torn in two. Love for her home and love for a man she would die for. If she was younger her answer would be Sasuke, without a second thought. But now she wasn't so sure anymore.

While she was trying not to fry her brains out, she didn't notice Sasuke has gotten out of the rope, until she felt warm, protective hands around her, making her feel safe and relax, which made her frustrated more. She also didn't notice that tears of desperation were running down her cheeks. Why her?

"Shh, it's ok Sakura, you know what you have to do, and everything is going to be ok…" His comforting words did nothing than make her more angry and lost. Him being so sweet and understanding, letting her know that he was going to be ok with her decision. Oh God, how she loved that man!

"It's not ok Sasuke, it will never be! You know very well I have orders to kill you, but how can I? I have to kill a man I love so much!" Her angry voice came so broken that it made his heart clench even more if possible. His love was is miserable, and it was his fault. So he kissed her with everything he had to offer, all the feelings, all the thoughts, everything. It wasn't one of those kisses where you're happy; it was desperate, needy, and passionate.

"I know…but I also can make you go against your home, our home, I could not live with that, and let's face it I am a broken man, destroying everything in my power, I'm only a treat to everyone…" He didn't believe what he said, but he tried.

"Oh Sasuke you know very well we are the same, broken people with more power than most, lost souls, ghosts of kids we used to be, so don't give me all that shit…please I can't take it anymore…" Broken whisper, full of lost meaning, dull and monotone, just like them.

"Hn…you knew this day would come, and do what I told you…no buts, ifs and no's, I told you to get over me and move on" He did not want her to move on, he wanted her to stay by his side forever, but there is no forever, at least not for them, so he was doing what was best for her, even if it broke him in the process.

As their kisses turned into something more so did the sun come closer. So little time to say goodbye…

With one last long kiss Sasuke broke away, still holding her. It was time…

"Sakura, shh, don't cry, please, it's time, do it now…" Pain was written all over his face, but he knew what was needed to be done, and he was ready.

"Sasuke…" As much as she tried the tears could not stop. She took her Kanata out of its holster, but never tried to come and attack. Her hands were shaking badly, heart sinking every moment she stood there.

Sasuke saw that she could not do it, so he came forward, in a flash, and kissed her with his entire being, pricing his heart in the process.

It took Sakura a minute to understand what had he done. At the taste of his blood in her mouth, she kissed him harder, closing her eyes tight, refusing to see love of her life die. It was all too much, so much pain.

Soon he swayed, and then feeling his legs fail him he came crashing onto her. Only thing he wanted to see with his last moments in this world was her face, her beautiful emerald eyes. But most of all he wanted to see her smile one last smile, his special smile, just for him. No more tears…

"Ssakura…..smile…for...me…please…oone...last...time…" he could not form the sentence anymore. His eyes became heavier, his body going numb. But he would fight his last breath until he saw her smile…

"Ah Sasuke I love you…" So she out on her best smile, for him, smiling though the tears and pain she was feeling, just to make him happy.

"I… love you… too… cherry blossom…" It came out as a mare whisper, but she caught it, and it made her choke up, but a smile was still there.

Bending down, she kissed him one last time, feeling his lips turn cold, inhaling his last breath.

And the great Uchiha Sasuke closed his eyes forever to the world…along with his clan…he closed those beautiful obsidian eyes she loved so much…

Sakura Haruno was found holding the dead Uchiha in the morning, crying to the heavens, cursing her life, hating everyone…

Naruto was too angry and sad to notice her hurt, he blamed it all on her…and so did she…

* * *

Few days later in Konoha there was a funeral for the last Uchiha. It was traditional, and the whole village came, except one lonely woman, who watched from a building, avoiding the mass. She did not need this. Her mission was a success but she became numb, dead like in the process.

As the service was over near the grave stood a man, soon to become Hokage, looking at the resting place of his best friend, his bother. It made his sick just thinking how this all has ended. It felt so wrong on so many levels.

_Sasuke Uchiha_

_18 years old, head of the Uchiha clan_

_A true friend, honorable ninja, a loving man, _

_Broken person on the wrong path._

_May he rest in peace alongside his family…_

She really did try, she really did, but a life without love is like not living at all. She walked, she ate, she did everything she could to get back into her life, but no use. That was NOT here life anymore. There was no more her, Sakura Haruno, an ANBU, a great ninja, lovable person, humble soul no that was not her anymore. That was her shadow, her great past. Past, oh she had it, but she did not have any future, not without HIM.

* * *

It was only a month that passed from the last funeral, but here they were looking at a grave of a great woman. Looking for a soul of once beloved Sakura Haruno. They found her dead in her bed, bleeding from her wrist, a note near her. In it were her apologizes, and an explanation for everything she did. This made Naruto weak, heart bleed, stomach sink. He lost a sister today. Another person he held dear and he didn't get to say sorry and goodbye.

_ Sakura Haruno_

_18 years old, medic nin,_

_A loyal ninja, great friend, loving woman,_

_Rest in peace my friend and I hope you meet him there and be happy_

Konoha was in great morn for the two lovers, wishing that things turned out different. But Naruto pressed on, achieving his goal, with a smile on his face, and for a moment he saw faces of his friends smiling at him, while in an embrace with loving looks in their eyes. At that moment Naruto let go, knowing his friends were happy and together where ever they may be…

* * *

So here is my new story…I didn't write for some time so I'm a little rusty, but I'm also proud of my work… this is the best story I think I have written so far….so hope you enjoy it. Oh yea read and review :D 3

Love Shadowgirl


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